Ever dated a man who you shared an incredible connection with, but then
he suddenly wanted his "freedom" or said he wasn't ready when you
started to get close?
What's going on here? Why does this happen for so many women with men?
Is it that all men are afraid of getting close?
Or could there be something else going on here too that women are often doing that helps trigger this kind of response in a man?
I've discovered that the way lots of women talk about moving into to a
more secure and COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP with a man is a HUGE part of why
men stop wanting the relationship.
Too many women don't understand what they're accidentally communicating
about themselves to a man when they become even the least bit unsure or
uncomfortable about "where things are going."
And when it comes to deciding whether or not to move into a more serious
relationship, men have a finely-tuned radar for how a woman is acting.
To learn to avoid these kinds of common male responses to a new
relationship, and to know exactly what to do instead that will make a
man feel inspired and excited for a relationship with you the way he
hasn't felt with any other woman... you need to read THIS:
Are you one of the many single women in the world who would make an
AMAZING PARTNER for a man, but can't even find a decent date?
Do you ever feel like it's impossible to understand what a man is thinking when it comes to dating and relationships?
Do you ever wish that you could just skip the "games" and the
uncertainty that come with dating and get straight to something REAL?
If so, I want to share with you a few important ways to stop missing
out on the love and connection you're looking for... and start finding
and creating what you want with a man.
There's something I want to know about you first, though.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FIRST MEET A MAN YOU LIKE
I wonder how often this has happened to you:
You meet a man you find attractive and you go out on a date...
The date goes better than you imagined, and you find him even more interesting and desirable than you thought you would.
You feel great around him, and the conversation flows.
You both connect with each other and have all kinds of unbelievable things in common.
The more time you spend with him, the more you become excited about
where things could go... and that you've finally met a man who's fun,
attractive, AND who actually seems open and healthy as a person.
To top it off, the chemistry you share is AMAZING... and you share a steamy good-night kiss that proves it.
You can tell he's feeling it, too.
This is something more than just another date.
It's more than two people spending time together.
This is something special and real.
That's why you can't help yourself...
Before you even hear from him again, you're telling your girlfriends
all about him, what a great time you had, what it's like when you're
together, and when you're going to see each other next.
You're VERY excited about your new man.
You imagine introducing him to your friends.
You even allow yourself a fantasy or two about all the fun things
you'll do together in the weeks to come and what your life together
could be like.
You have a GREAT FEELING about this.
Best of all, he's calling you, emailing, and he wants to see you all the time.
And he's not only attractive and charming - it turns out he's a really good person, too.
After a few more dates, you're intimate with him because you feel so comfortable together. And the sex is AMAZING.
Things are going so great that you say to yourself,
"At last! A real man I truly connect with. I better not screw this up!"
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN FEAR AND DOUBT SETS IN
But just then you realize how much he is starting to mean to you, and in the back of your mind it kind of freaks you out.
And it's then that the dating and relationship nightmares from your past flash back in your mind...
You don't want to feel the pain you felt in the past ever again, and
you start to feel afraid that the same things could happen again.
Your mind races with fear and anxiety.
But to keep it together, you put faith in the situation and in this
man. You tell yourself that it's different this time, and that he isn't
one of those other guys.
And to make sure things keep moving forward in the right direction,
you start trying a little harder with him to get it right this time.
You do all kinds of nice things for him.
You make the effort to find out all about him, understand him, and
help him out with the things that are going on for him in his life.
You even start to do things like favors, errands, etc., just because
you want him to know how much you care and to be close to him.
In the back of your mind you really hope he'll recognize all the
great things you're doing for him, and how amazing you and your
relationship can be.
With all you're doing for him and your relationship, he'd be crazy not to want to be with you.
But after a few more dates, suddenly something starts to feel WRONG...
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FEEL THAT "SHIFT" IN HIM
Suddenly, that same easy and free way of loving and being with each other feels different.
You realize how much you're doing for him and all the ways you're trying, and then it hits you -
He isn't making much of an effort to do anything for you or your relationship.
Not the way you are with him.
Then you realize that he's calling you less than he used to.
He doesn't seem as excited to be with you and share his thoughts and feelings as he used to be at first.
He even stops making much in the way of plans, and starts doing a lot of other things he wasn't doing before.
And since you don't want to keep calling him, you wait for his call... hoping he'll make weekend plans with you.
But Thursday comes, and then Friday, and still no call.
Your worst fears are starting to be realized.
But you don't want to overreact.
So even though you're hurt and upset that he didn't call you, you want to be with him, so you reluctantly call him.
You tell yourself there must be a good reason, and that he's been busy or something.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN HE DOESN'T EVEN SOUND LIKE THE SAME GUY
When you finally get a hold of him, he talks like he hardly knows you and you've never been close.
You try to be casual and ask him what he's been doing, but you want to know why he hasn't called you.
Then you find out he's going out and doing things with friends and other people.
Arggggh! He didn't even invite you!
Wait a minute...
Aren't you two an "item"? Shouldn't you be doing something TOGETHER on weekends and in your free time?
You start feeling really FRUSTRATED and CONFUSED.
Maybe he doesn't see what's going on, so you decide to let him know how you feel and "call him on it."
You tell him how upset you felt that he didn't ask you to hang out with him and his friends.
And you ask him what's going on, and why he's being this way with you.
But he doesn't respond the way you'd want or expect him too.
Instead of listening to you and your feelings... he gets irritated and ANGRY with you - as though you're "hassling" him.
After some arguing and back and forth, he seems to shift gears in the
conversation and says something that really makes your heart SINK -
something you had a gut FEELING you'd hear from him with this going
on...
He tells you,
"Look... you're great, but the truth is that I'm not ready or in the
right place for any kind of 'serious' relationship right now."
And he goes on to tell you about all the things going on in his life
that are taking up his time and energy, and that he doesn't know how to
settle down right now.
Ouch.
WHAT THE HELL IS HE TALKING ABOUT!?
Why is he acting like you're going to get in the way of the rest of his life?
Why did he ask you out in the first place, and spend all that time
sharing himself, being with you, and connecting with you if he didn't
want a relationship all along?
Couldn't he have told you that when you first met, instead of asking you out?
Why did he spend all that time with you and sleep with you if he didn't want to be with you?
And how come he doesn't recognize or appreciate all the things you bring to his life, and all the things that you do for him?
At this point, you feel incredibly hurt, frustrated, unappreciated, and misunderstood.
You even become intensely UPSET and ANGRY with him, and with
yourself. How could you have misunderstood what was happening and not
have seen this coming!?
Why did he do all the things he did, and why did he SAY all those
things that made you think HE WANTED a relationship with you?
Now, if you've experienced a situation like this with a man before,
then I really feel for you... and I want to show you how to keep this
very common situation from ever happening to you again.
It's all inside this special letter about my "From Casual To
Committed" program which shows you exactly how COMMITMENT works for a
man and how to set things up right from the start with a man:
In this program, I teach you how to avoid these kinds of situation I
described above in the first place so that a man is the one PURSUING YOU
and not the other way around.
*Hint: if you want a man to fall for you and want a long-term
relationship, then you can't set up the dynamic where you are the one
Pursuing him.
My "From Casual To Committed" program will show you what to do when a
great guy who you share a real connection, chemistry, and attraction
with PULLS AWAY from you just as you start to get closer and a little
more "serious."
THE LAST THING YOU WANT TO DO WHEN A MAN SHIFTS GEARS
Now, back to our story and this frustratingly common situation women run into with men.
In the story above, for lots of women the story doesn't end there when the man says he's not ready for anything serious.
Why?
Because they either don't want to listen to the man, or they refuse to believe him.
And then what happens?
Some women actually go on to spend the next few weeks or maybe even
MONTHS doing everything they can to try and win the guy back.
They think that if they can just get him to stop ignoring what it is
that they share, and to not be afraid, that the guy will "come to his
senses" and come back to them.
If you've ever been in this situation, or known a woman who was, here
are the 5 most common ways women respond that don't work and push men
away or turn them off for good:
1) Pretending you don't want anything serious either and keep on
sleeping with the man "casually" in hopes that things will grow from the
"physical relationship"
2) Staying close to him by trying to become his "best friend" as you
help him in his life and with his problems - all the while imagining the
"payoff" of a real relationship for your good deeds once he recognizes
how great you are
3) Trying to make him jealous by telling him you're seeing other guys,
even if you're not. Or going out with other guys and doing things with
them not because you like them, but because you want him to find out and
want you back
4) Getting upset with him and telling him he's dumb, immature, and
acting like a little BOY...and that he's just scared of a real
relationship and a commitment - and then trying to get him to have a
relationship with you to "fix" himself
5) Trying to make him interested in you by complimenting him, doing nice
things for him, taking up things he's interested in to be around him...
and being available to him at anytime he should show interest. This is
kind of like trying to be his "best friend," but different since it's
often still sexual.
Here's the thing...
None of these responses work with men.
But, strangely enough, even though these universally don't get men to
respond in any positive way... these are still the most common ways
that women who don't understand men and dating respond.
Which begs me to ask the question...
Why do so many women respond in these ways in the first place?
The short answer is this:
If a woman responds to men in the 5 ways outlined above, it's NOT
because she "learned" it by seeing it work for other women with other
men.
Absolutely not.
It's because she does what MAKES SENSE to HER in the moment.
But guess what?
If you've spent enough time around men, then you've probably discovered that men DON'T MAKE MUCH SENSE.
See where I'm going here?
If you try and use what makes sense to YOU as a woman with a man... odds are you're going to get very poor results.
Which means...
If you want to start getting better outcomes and results when it
comes to men, and you want to be able to communicate with a man in a way
that brings him closer...
Then you're going to have to learn to STOP doing what makes "sense" to you...
And START doing what it is that makes a man FEEL ATTRACTED and MORE INTERESTED in you.
A NEW APPROACH: SHIFTING YOUR PERSPECTIVE TO GET GREAT RESULTS
In other words, the biggest challenge most women run into when it
comes to "breaking through" to men and getting past the surface dating
stuff and into a real relationship with a real man is not being able to
see past their own MINDSET and the approach they've been using that
hasn't worked.
But if you can learn to understand how your mindset affects how you
interpret and respond to a man, and you can start to get the kind of
PERSPECTIVE or AWARENESS that will lead you to knowing what's really
going on with a man, and how to respond... then things are quickly and
naturally going to fall into place for you.
If you want a QUICK primer in how men think and what makes them
respond POSITIVELY to you, then
You Should Go Here
Honestly, when you read my eBook, a giant lightbulb will go off in
your head, and you'll finally realize why you haven't been able to get
through to guys in the past, and what to do so that you never have to go
through the common story I told above.
Best of all, I'll let you read the entire thing at zero cost before you decide if you'd want to purchase it.
SO WHAT IS IT THAT MAKES A MAN TAKE THINGS TO THE NEXT LEVEL?
Men have all kinds of ways of thinking, seeing things, and behaviors
that aren't completely conscious but are what I'll call more BIOLOGICAL
or INSTINCTUAL.
These are things that have been instilled in them over thousands and
millions of years of "conditioning" during mating and courtship rituals
with women.
When a man is looking for a woman, a part of his instinctual "wiring"
unconsciously tells him to look for a woman who is healthy and "fit."
(Not just physically, but emotionally.)
This means that men are biologically wired to look for, and feel
"attracted" to women who have the qualities and traits that indicate a
high level of health and "fitness."
But unfortunately, this "screening process" that's going on inside a man's mind is largely UNCONSCIOUS.
In other words, a man can't and won't just walk up to a woman and say:
"Hi, I'm looking for a mate. I'd like to know if you would make a good mate for me. Are you any of the following?
-Emotional stable and secure in yourself so you'll make a great partner
for me and allow me to expand in my life instead of having to stay
"small" to make sure you're comfortable?
-Physically fit and healthy so you can conceive a healthy child, give birth, and raise him/her?
-"Genetically fit" so that you have a high likelihood to bear successful
offspring by passing off great qualities like size, strength,
intelligence, immunity, etc?
-Intelligent, "funny", and resourceful so that you can not only be a
mate that makes me feel attracted to you and want to conceive lots of
children... but also help in this world of hard- to-come-by resources?
-Going to make a great mother who can care for our child and raise it while I'm out trying to "provide"?
Catch my drift?
This is part of the reason why so often a woman will ask a man why
he's feeling one way or another... or why he's acting different or not
interested in a relationship and he can't explain it.
It's just the way he FEELS.
Either he FEELS ATTRACTED. Or he doesn't.
Of course, these "biological buttons" aren't the only thing going on inside a man's mind.
HOW A MAN ACTIVELY CHOOSES A PARTNER
Men do have more CONSCIOUS processes for the way they choose a woman, and for the way they feel.
If trying to cram all this into your head and understand what it
means, and how to respond to all these things while trying to have a
real conversation with a man seems ridiculous and daunting to you, it
should.
The reality is that you can't sit and think to yourself... "Gee, I'd
like him to think I'd make a good mate who could rear successful and
healthy children, I'll tell him about how healthy me and my family are."
It just doesn't work that way.
A man looks at much subtler "cues" about a woman that tell him what to think.
Some of these "cues" are:
-Physical Appearance (the obvious one): If you have a specific
hip-to-waist ratio, without consciously "measuring" it, a man will see
it and possibly feel a physical attraction
-Health: Things like how white the whites in your eyes are, your scent,
and the tone and nature of your skin are all subtle indicators of a
healthy immune system. Men find white eyes, certain scents, and smooth
skin attractive not because they know they indicate that a woman is
healthy and will have a high likelihood of success for offspring, but
because they FEEL ATTRACTED to these things for some reason.
-"Emotional Fitness": If a woman has the kind of attitude and "vibe"
about her that is fun to be around, stimulating, exciting, and positive
and consistent... then a man unconsciously will see her as a good
long-term mate.
To find out all the things that truly interest and attract men, as
well as the more subtle and complex things that make a man become
EMOTIONALLY INVOLVED with a woman...it could take you a long long time
to figure out - years of unnecessary trial and error.
Luckily, I've done the work for you.
I've spent my time doing years of research, observation, interviews,
etc. to get deep inside the mind of men... and I've also spent years
talking with women about every question under the sun about how to
create the love life they want with a man.
It also doesn't hurt that I happen to be a man myself who has been
through all kinds of situations in dating and relationships with
women... and I have the perspective of how these things work for a man.
Now I want to share what I've learned with you... and help you the way I've helped literally thousands of other women.
HOW A MAN'S COMMITMENT PROCESS REALLY WORKS
If you'd like to learn how men think when it comes to the dating
process... and how a man really thinks about a woman and getting
involved in a real relationship with her, then I've got just what you
need.
Women who don't understand what the dating and COMMITMENT PROCESS is
like inside a man's mind seem to keep running into the same painful
situations, frustrations, and traps with men.
The way a man grows close to a woman, the reasons why he chooses her
over another woman, and when and why he decides to start sharing himself
with her and growing a real and committed relationship is simply
different than it is for most women.
My program From Casual to Committed explains the entire dating and
"commitment process" of a man, and I delivered this program live to real
women like you.
It was a huge success, and it felt great to know that I not only
answered the tough questions women had and needed answered in the live
event...but that they were able to take what they learned, apply it in
their lives, and get REAL RESULTS with the man in their life.
One of the biggest "make it or break it" points for women in
relationships with men is when you start to grow close and want to move
from just a casual and unspoken thing into a deeper and more serious
relationship.
If you've ever felt "stuck" in your love life because you didn't know
how to break through the "casual dating" stage with a man and move into
a real and committed relationship, I can help.
If you know much about men, then you probably already know that the
answer with a man in this situation is NOT to ask him for a commitment.
Lots of women try this and become frustrated and baffled when the man
they thought they were close to completely pulls away from them and
even tries to end the relationship all together.
If you want to grow your relationship with a man, the best way to
move into a committed relationship isn't to come up against his
"EMOTIONAL RESISTANCE" to commitment when you bring it up.
The best relationships that women enjoy most, and that last the
longest, are the ones where THE MAN is leading the woman into a
committed relationship.
Where HE is asking HER to COMMIT TO HIM.
For the greatest chance at happiness and success with a man, and to
be able to quickly and easily move from a casual situation to a real and
committed relationship with a man, the answer is to learn:
1) How the commitment process works for him, and what each of the
critical steps and experiences are that he needs to have before he'll
truly physically and emotionally commit
2) How to make a man want to be with you and lead you in to a committed relationship
3) How to keep your relationship growing and healthy so that you both
stay emotionally involved and fulfilled by the relationship
This is exactly what you'll learn in my From Casual To Committed program.
If you really want love in your life, and you want it to LAST on your
next go round... then don't wait for your relationship to figure itself
out.
Empower yourself.
Don't wait for a man to figure it out and make your relationship work for you.
Don't wait until you're dating the right guy and in a great
relationship to learn how to help it grow and make it work with him.
Make it happen now.
I've done all the research and study and have already helped tens of
thousands of women finally create the love and relationship they worried
wasn't possible before.
So it's time for you to feel what love is meant to feel like when you know how to get a man to help make it last with you.
I'll talk to you again soon, and best of luck in life and love!
Your Friend,
Christian Carter
